


Not Over You

by purple_bird123



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Anal sex??, Don't Go, Love, Love Hurts, M/M, Pre Kerberos, Stay, it hurts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-07 15:41:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16856758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/purple_bird123/pseuds/purple_bird123
Summary: I love Adashi and I want to believe they really did love each other. I can't imagine how hard it was for the both of them when Shiro decided to leave. I know we all blame Adam for being a jerk...but...I can't sit by and only look at one side of the story.Be prepared to grab the tissues!





	1. Why Do You Do It?

**Author's Note:**

> "Don't want to watch when I break down into tears  
> I won't try to make you stay  
> I won't even try to change your mind"  
> ~Colbie Caillat

**AN:Chapters will get longer. I'm just in the middle of Exam time so they will get longer and possibly better in the next two weeks to come!**

 Adam sat silently listening to his ex-fiancés dog tags gently make music as Shiro packed up his bag for the launch.

“Where are you going?” Adam asked opening his closed eyes and looked over at Shiro, “the launch isn’t until eight tomorrow morning.” He eyed the bag Shiro had zipped up. Shiro turned his gaze to the ground, “I’m heading out with Keith.”

Adam looked down at his hands, his hands where he once supported a elegant engagement ring and sighed whispering, “right…Keith.”

“Don’t wait up okay?” Shiro gave a sad smile as he brought the bag over his shoulder as a gentle knock was heard shortly after.

Adam looked at Shiro who looked eager to go get the door, eager to flee from the tension.

“Good luck Adam. On everything.” Shiro looked over at him. Adam gave a weak smile, “you too.”

Shiro took a deep breath and walked over opening the door, “hey you ready?”

“Yea.” Keith’s voice was heard. Adam rolled his eyes and got up and headed to the kitchen area to pour himself some coffee.

“Hey Adam!” Keith acknowledged.

Shiro kept his face straight out the door when Adam turned to look. Keith had a soft smile to his lips. Adam gave a smile, “don’t keep him out too late.”

“Wouldn’t dream about it.” Keith smiled. “Let’s head off Cadet.” Shiro placed a tender hand on Keith’s arm and guided him away from the door.

Adam put the coffee cup down, taking off his glasses as big fat tears slipped down from his eyes. Was it too much to wish that Shiro would come back tonight. Come back and slip in behind him in the comfort of their double bed. Underneath the sheets that smelt like home. Was it too much? 

Adam clenched his fists, no Adam stop! He shook his head, Shiro chose the mission over you, over his goddamn health! "Idiot!" Adam shouted and pounded his fists onto the counter top causing droplets of coffee dance their way out of the mug and onto the counter top.

"You made your choice...I made mine...you can't chose you over us...Shiro you can't..." turning  to lean against the counter he felt his knees go weak as he slowly slid down and put his head in his hands, "you chose you..." clenching his hair in his fists he cussed Shiro's name, cussed their relationship, cussed the fucking engagement!

It was only a year into their engagement and they planned on getting married in the next two years to come. Shiro would get better...he was going to...he worked harder than anyone to keep his medical condition under control. He was improving, Adam knew he was...but what if it disappeared as quickly as it came. What happens if it comes back worse...Adam clenched his fists, "stupid Takashi." He laughed shaking his head, "you always were too optimistic."

Tears slid down his face, tears he couldn't describe. He wanted to be happy for Shiro, he was living his dream. Adam knew his dreams and intentions when he got into this relationship. He knew Shiro since they were 14. They were flight partners, and top of the class after all.

But this mission to Kerbero's...this was a long one...a diffiicult one. Shiro's been training hard for it...he would come back late into the night from training, drenched in sweat and sometimes sick to his stomach. He pushed himself too hard and Adam couldn't bare it to sit there and watch...to listen...

He'd get out from the comfort of the sheets to feel the shivers travel up his body as he stepped onto the cold tile floor as he made his way over to his sick lover. He would grab a bottle of poweraid and lean against the counter ready to hand it to Shiro after he emptied his stomach. 

~~

"Drink it." He handed Shiro the white liquid.

Shiro smiled and took the bottle and popped the lid, "I'm okay Adam."

Adam raised his eyebrows, "sure, say that to lunch." Adam walked over to the shower and turned the water on, getting it at the right temperature before going over to Shiro and walk close to him and ask him the same question he always asked, "why do you do it?"

"Do what?" Shiro would always respond.

"Push yourself." Adam would sigh and rest his head on Shiro's chest as Shiro drank the liquid. They would stay silent listening to the water running.

~~~

"Why do you do it? Why Takashi? Why do you push yourself?" Adam's eyes dripped sore with tears, his body shaking as he clenched his knees to his chest, "why Takashi..." He called out silently, praying to whoever was listening that Shiro would hear this small cry.


	2. I'm Sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Lights Off, Eyes Open  
> Lie Still, Mind Racing  
> Colours flash and fade"  
> ~Lowes

"Hey you okay?" Keith looked up from tightening a bolt on the speeder.

"Pardon?" Shiro asked looking over at the young cadet. Keith put down his tool and walked over to Shiro, "are you nervous for tomorrow? Don't be? You're the best pilot. You can do this." Keith smiled.

Shiro gave a small smile, "thanks, Keith..." He looked out into the horizon.

"Shiro..."

"Yes?"

"Why didn't you take Adam to the launch pad? Usually he goes with you."

Shiro looked at the young cadet, he was growing more and more into a man each day. "Don't worry yourself about us Keith." He gave a smile, "we're good." It pained his heart, they weren't good...he prayed that Keith wouldn't pick up on his small white lie. He looked over at him, Keith looked at him, "then why are you with me? Why did you bring me?"

"We're fine Keith!" Shiro snapped. Keith stood straighter, "no you're not Shiro! What's going on! I hate it when you lie to me!" Keith's voice was stern, he was more of a man than Shiro was this very moment. He smiled, Keith would be okay when he went away.

"Keith...He broke up with me."

Keith went silent, "I'll wait for you..."

"Keith...maybe Adam is right." Shiro looked into the sky, the sun was setting causing the desert sky to be a colorful combination of red, yellow and oranges.

"Right?" Keith asked leaning against the speeder next to Shiro who kept his gaze into the distance, "maybe he's right...there's no point of hanging around and waiting for me." Shiro clenched the devices on his wrists, "I'm sick Keith...you know that...I just...I want to prove it to myself that I can catch my dreams and that nothing can stop me from reaching them...but Adam brought up a valid point...I've broken a lot of records in the past few years...so why do I want to go to Kerberos?"

Keith smiled, "you want to go because it's your dream? You want to go because it's the furthest anyone has been in space! You're a goddamn good pilot Shiro!" Keith smiled, "and you'll come back with so many amazing stories!"

Shiro smiled, "yea."

"Shiro..."

"Yes?"

"Go to Adam...I'll meet up with you in the morning to send you off?"

Shiro smiled, "But this isn't completely done." He tapped the old speeder. Keith smiled, "I'll finish it by the time you get back. You'll be surprised to see how much I can do by myself."

Shiro smiled, "okay. Don't let anyone catch you after curfew tonight!" Shiro ordered. Keith rolled his eyes, "never."

Shiro smiled and pulled Keith into a hug, "see you tomorrow Keith."

"Sleep well Shiro." Keith hugged back. Shiro took a moment to breath, to accept that Keith was really going to wait around...why would Keith do that? He's only been abandoned over and over again...it pained Shiro's heart...he will come back right?

~~~

He froze, his hand extended to the door knob. He wanted to turn back and crash into an overnight pod that was reserved for overnight watch. His hand shook, maybe he should just go...he booked one for himself after all...He took a deep breath and turned the door knob and walked into the dark room. He gently closed the door hearing the soft click loud in his ears. He didn't know if he wanted Adam to wake up or not.

He looked around the room, the bathroom's door was open, the dishes were drying on the counter and Adam's body was seen on the bed...probably sound asleep. 

He walked over to the nightstand, where his medication was sitting. His eyes now adjusted to the dark, he could see Adam's back was facing him, his breath was steady. Shiro took hold of the pill bottle not wanting it to wake him up. He wouldn't know what to say if he did awake.

Walking over to the bathroom, he made sure to shut the door before turning on the light. On the counter...there was a bottle of powerade. Shiro put the pill bottle down and grabbed the bottle of the liquid and sat down on the tubs edge and twisted the cap. He brought the open bottle to his lips and savored the taste of the sweet cheery. 

Shiro looked down at the floor and sighed, maybe Adam was right...there was a small knock on the door causing Shiro to drop the bottle as the liquid covered the floor. Shit.

"Takashi?" Adam's voice was small.

"Yea?" Shiro stood up and grabbed some toilet paper to quickly make the mess disappear before grabbing a cloth.

"You're back earlier than I expected." 

Shiro wet the washcloth before getting on his hands and knees to clean up, making sure the floors wouldn't get sticky later on.

"It was past curfew." 

"Didn't stop you two before."

Shiro looked down at the floor, "have to make sure Keith stays on good behavior when I'm away. Thought I'd start training him now."

"Little late to _train_ him don't you think?"

Shiro sighed, "yea..." Silence. Shiro closed his eyes trying to listen...to see if he could hear Adam walk back to the bed. But nothing...

"Adam?"

"Takashi?"

Adam was still there, on the other side of the door.

"Thank you."

"For?"

Shiro got up and opened the door to see Adam sitting against the wall in nothing but his pajama bottoms.

"For the drink. Though..." He chuckled, "the floor got most of it." He ran his hand through his hair.

Adam stayed silent not taking the joke. Shiro's heart hurt badly...he wanted to stay but he couldn't...maybe when he got back...no...he said he wasn't going to be around when he came back...

"Adam..."

"What?"

"Will you really not wait for me?" Shiro sat down beside him and looked at him. His eyes were closed as he slowly shook his head, wet tears slipped down his cheek, "no."

Shiro sat silently, he didn't know what to do. He wanted to leave but every time he tried his body would stay grounded.

"Can we...can we pretend this isn't us right now..." Shiro looked down at his hands, tears of his own were threatening to spill. He listened to the sound of his heart beat, his own breath...waiting for Adam to answer.

Adam shook his head, "we made our choices Takashi."

Shiro looked over at him, he was keeping his gaze straight ahead. Slow movements Shiro made his way closer inch by inch, to be closer to Adam. Their shoulders touching, as Shiro watched a tear make it's way down Adam's elegant face. Shiro badly wanted to kiss it to hold Adam in his grasp and tell him...

"Adam..." Shiro's tears slipped as his jaw quivered, his chest tightening up.

Adam turned around his breath hot on Shiro's face, their faces inches apart.

"I love you." Shiro took a deep breath and held onto Adam's shoulders as he begged for forgiveness, his head on Adam's chest, his nails digging into Adam's flesh, "I'm sorry."

"I am too." Adam breathed and held onto Shiro's head, pressing it against him, "I am too."


End file.
